Tuesday 12 April 2011

Queue and mind the bloody gap


   Well across the pond in London and while rushed and hectic it has been rewarding.  We all know Rhys Munroe stays at Fairmont Hotels and now I know why! Tired and dragging myself from the roomy confines of the BMW 750 that delivered me my luggage was gone before I exited. Luckily for the staff I actually caught the briefest glimpse, as the bags were hurried inside. I was received and thought for a bit, word of my book and inclusion in London had preceded me. Alas it had not, they just treat everyone like their famous. Good hotel staffs are a great deal like good security. It should be invisible and intuitive. Until you need it.  Yesterday I needed it.
   So today in a frugal attempt to offset the delirious costs one finds in London I took the tube. Should have been a simple thing, get the Oyster travel card load it and viola cheap travel. The Oyster card is like a tap and go credit card for transit. You have to buy it in one location and then load it in another. No wonder these people love to queue! The technological chasm to buy a card and fill it in one transaction is simple, so it must be this love of lining up for things, on the right. AND MIND THE GAP!
   Ok so on the train and flashing frugally toward the LBF at a very ungodly early hour. I was wondering if my body would suddenly realize this and crash, rag doll, to the floor when the speaker calmly told us that we needed to exit the station due to an emergency.  Fine if I had been on a station this would have been slightly less alarming. But I was on a bloody train! Considering the events in Ireland in a past few days the irony and karma were not lost on me of being blown to bits by an Irish bomb. So I found myself whistling the song from the Monty Python movie. “Always look on the bright side of life.” While politely forming a bloody queue! Brilliant.
   It was just a fire on one of the other trains but I guess this is a big deal. Either way it was dealt with and sorted out as the locals would say, and I arrived early for the LBF, and as I was an author was allowed to jump the queue and enter early. Which in this country is akin to getting waved into a Vegas bar offered on the house bottle service and bumping George Clooney!!!
   I got to see my book in the New Releases section and to my quiet joy three suited men were head bent in discussion. They were very animated and seemed to be in a heated discourse. I listened as one of them argued that the book was actually authentic and based on real events. The others argued and various points were put forward and as I was a little too close it seemed they wanted to drag me into the conversation as well. One them asked me what I thought and then clued into my attendants badge. I just smiled and said; “Enjoy the ride gentlemen.” 

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